Adult Children of Alcoholics

Many women who grew up in alcoholic or otherwise “dysfunctional” families don’t really grow up in some ways. Emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually they are stuck with coping methods that were useful (and necessary) in childhood but are not useful in adulthood.

For the most part, these women function fairly well as long as things are going smoothly. But when it comes to conflict, intimacy, or difficult circumstances – especially in important relationships - things go awry.  

There are common characteristics that "adult children" – those who grew up in dysfunctional homes and are now adults, yet are in some ways stuck in childhood - seem to share. The following characteristics were developed by Dr. Janet G. Woititz, a pioneer of Adult Child psychology.  

Adult Children:

• guess at what normal is.
• have difficulty in completing projects.
• judge themselves without mercy.
• have difficulty having fun.
• take themselves very seriously.
• have difficulty with intimate relationships.
• overreact to changes over which they have no control.
• constantly seek approval and affirmation.
• feel that they are different from other people.
• are either super responsible or super irresponsible.
• are extremely loyal, even in the face of evidence that loyalty is undeserved.

Not all Adult Children have these traits, and not all who have them came from alcoholic families. However, if any of these sound familiar, you may benefit from consulting with a counselor.

Living with these characteristics is difficult. Adult Children are often more prone to chaos, depression, anxiety, relationship conflict and more if the core issues are not resolved. Contact me to see how I can help.